从前有一个大财主，一天他收集了一大箱金银珠宝，用一个铁箱和一把锁把它锁起来，自己把钥匙收藏起来。有一天，恰好他家这天遇到了小偷把他收藏的这一箱金银珠宝盗了。这时候，他的管家来对他说：“老爷，我们家的那一箱珠宝被人偷了。”这个财主还洋洋得意地说：“急什么，大惊小怪的，反正钥匙还在我这呢！”
Once upon a time there was a very rich man, and one day he received a huge trunk of diamonds and pearls, he used a lock to lock the trunk, and hid the key. One day, a thief broke into his house and stole the trunk full of jewels. At this time, his housekeeper said, "Monsieur, your very precious jewels have been, ah, stolen. the Master happily proclaimed, "What's the rush? You look so harried, anyways, I still have the key!"
Sunday, November 18, 2007
Croc shoes
Indigo's comments: "what a pair of idiots!"
有两个傻子想开鞋店，听说鳄鱼的鞋值钱，他们就去河里抓鳄鱼了，还真没少抓，都40多只了。一个傻子说：“大哥，抓到第50只鳄鱼它要是再没穿鞋咱就别抓了。
There was once two idiots who wanted to open a shoe store, and they heard that croc shoes cost a lot, so they went to catch some crocs, and they had caught a lot, they had over 40. One idiot said, "Hey, bro, when we catch the 50th croc, and they still don't have any shoes, let's stop."
有两个傻子想开鞋店，听说鳄鱼的鞋值钱，他们就去河里抓鳄鱼了，还真没少抓，都40多只了。一个傻子说：“大哥，抓到第50只鳄鱼它要是再没穿鞋咱就别抓了。
There was once two idiots who wanted to open a shoe store, and they heard that croc shoes cost a lot, so they went to catch some crocs, and they had caught a lot, they had over 40. One idiot said, "Hey, bro, when we catch the 50th croc, and they still don't have any shoes, let's stop."
What a Pig!
一群动物过江，至江心船开始进水，必须有一部分动物下水才行。聪明的猴子想了一个主意，让各人讲一个笑话，若讲出的笑话不能让所有人发笑，就要把讲的人扔下水。于是开始抽签，结果是从猫第一个讲，然后是猴子、鸡…… 猫费尽心思讲了一个笑话，结果所有的人都笑了，只有猪不笑。无奈动物们只得把猫扔下了水。猴子的笑话更是让人笑的前仰后合，但是猪还是不笑，猴子也只得去喂鱼。鸡害怕了，连聪明的猴子都难逃此劫……孰料猪此时笑了，众动物怪曰：鸡还没讲，你笑什么？猪曰：猫的笑话真好笑！
A group of animals wanted to cross a big river, but in the middle of the river the boat started to sink, and they had to push some animals into the river. The smart monkey thought of an idea, and said that everyone had to tell a joke, and if not everyone laughed at the joke told, the animal had to walk the plank. (arr!) So they played rock-paper-scissors, and the cat was the first to tell the joke, followed up by Monkey, Chicken, etc... the cat took a great deal of effort to tell the joke, and everyone laughed their butts off, except for Pig. So they had no choice but to kick the cat off of the boat. The joke that Monkey told got the others to laugh so hard they got indigestion, but the pig still didn't laugh, so they fed Monkey to the fishes. Chicken's legs shook with fear, even Smart Monkey couldn't escape the inevitable fate of the dangerous waters...but whaddya know, Pig started laughing, all the animals asked, "Chicken still hasn't even spoken yet, what are you laughing at?" Pig replied,"The joke that Cat told is so funny!"
A group of animals wanted to cross a big river, but in the middle of the river the boat started to sink, and they had to push some animals into the river. The smart monkey thought of an idea, and said that everyone had to tell a joke, and if not everyone laughed at the joke told, the animal had to walk the plank. (arr!) So they played rock-paper-scissors, and the cat was the first to tell the joke, followed up by Monkey, Chicken, etc... the cat took a great deal of effort to tell the joke, and everyone laughed their butts off, except for Pig. So they had no choice but to kick the cat off of the boat. The joke that Monkey told got the others to laugh so hard they got indigestion, but the pig still didn't laugh, so they fed Monkey to the fishes. Chicken's legs shook with fear, even Smart Monkey couldn't escape the inevitable fate of the dangerous waters...but whaddya know, Pig started laughing, all the animals asked, "Chicken still hasn't even spoken yet, what are you laughing at?" Pig replied,"The joke that Cat told is so funny!"
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